Guest Tony n Terrific Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 (edited) My wife and I get along very well. I am an organized person that plans things out. Plan your activities and then work your activities. My SO has a tendency to change horses in the middle of the stream w/o thought. Life is full of lateral movements and I can accept this to a point.Today we invited a friend of hers over for dinner. Since I am of Italian heritage her friend wanted me to cook an Italian meal. My SO told me later on that we would make Chinese cusine tonight instead. Ok fine. When her friend showed up she told me she could not wait to try my Italian dinner. My wife said no problem. Tony make her Italian food. I was not prepared to do this on such a short notice. Certain Italain foods require at least and hour or longer of simmering so all the flavors marry up together. Has anyone of you fellows had this type of experience? Is this a culture clash or what. Edited April 22, 2009 by Tony n Terrific (see edit history) Link to comment
jsa23 Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Has anyone of you fellows had this type of experience? Is this a culture clash or what. Yes I like to plan ahead. She likes to take things as they come and sometimes change the plan on relatively short notice. This doesn't bother her, but can be stressful for me. I'm not 100% sure whether it's a cultural thing or simply a personality trait. Link to comment
Guest ShaQuaNew Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 My wife and I get along very well. I am an organized person that plans things out. Plan your activities and then work your activities. My SO has a tendency to change horses in the middle of the stream w/o thought. Life is full of lateral movements and I can accept this to a point.Today we invited a friend of hers over for dinner. Since I am of Italian heritage her friend wanted me to cook an Italian meal. My SO told me later on that we would make Chinese cusine tonight instead. Ok fine. When her friend showed up she told me she could not wait to try my Italian dinner. My wife said no problem. Tony make her Italian food. I was not prepared to do this on such a short notice. Certain Italain foods require at least and hour or longer of simmering so all the flavors marry up together. Has anyone of you fellows had this type of experience? Is this a culture clash or what. Yep. Yes, and affirmative. Good for you for going with the flow. There's plenty more coming... Link to comment
yemmie Posted April 22, 2009 Report Share Posted April 22, 2009 Yes, I think it must be cutural. My wife does this all the time, and you are right, sometimes it is very stressful, but I'm getting used to it. Link to comment
whome? Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 My wife and I get along very well. I am an organized person that plans things out. Plan your activities and then work your activities. My SO has a tendency to change horses in the middle of the stream w/o thought. Life is full of lateral movements and I can accept this to a point.Today we invited a friend of hers over for dinner. Since I am of Italian heritage her friend wanted me to cook an Italian meal. My SO told me later on that we would make Chinese cusine tonight instead. Ok fine. When her friend showed up she told me she could not wait to try my Italian dinner. My wife said no problem. Tony make her Italian food. I was not prepared to do this on such a short notice. Certain Italain foods require at least and hour or longer of simmering so all the flavors marry up together. Has anyone of you fellows had this type of experience? Is this a culture clash or what. Yep. Yes, and affirmative. Good for you for going with the flow. There's plenty more coming... Agreed ... she is is helping me to "go with flow" and learning from me that planning is not always bad. I have experienced the same in business. It is not unusal to have most of your meetings be scheduled 0-1 days in advance. If we plan to go eat outside in the evening and I ask her "where do you want to eat" I always make sure to try and get there within 5-10 minutes otherwise the preffered eating establishment will have changed at least a dozen times!! Different is fun!! Link to comment
Zhou Zhou Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 My lao po does make plans and likes to be on time (military career?), but many times she fails to tell me the whole plan and this irritates me. But like 'whome' and 'sqn' said...it has taught me to chill out and go with the flow...like Lao Tzu said, Life is to short to always be pissed-off. (not in quotes) There has been several times I got very upset with thing in the PRC...I found her doing all she could to make up for my upsets and also could see she was hurt, inside. This really hurt me and made me promise her and myself not to get upset over silly and trite things. Even on our day from hell...our day at the marriage office I stayed cool while Ying argued with the office manager for 20 minutes w/o coming up for air. ZZ Link to comment
george lee Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 culture or not, get use to it and go with the flow, i know i have. Link to comment
Zhou Zhou Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 culture or not, get use to it and go with the flow, i know i have. My lao po laughs when I say to her,"Yes my dear"... Link to comment
heyjimi Posted April 23, 2009 Report Share Posted April 23, 2009 My wife and I get along very well. I am an organized person that plans things out. Plan your activities and then work your activities. My SO has a tendency to change horses in the middle of the stream w/o thought. Life is full of lateral movements and I can accept this to a point.Today we invited a friend of hers over for dinner. Since I am of Italian heritage her friend wanted me to cook an Italian meal. My SO told me later on that we would make Chinese cusine tonight instead. Ok fine. When her friend showed up she told me she could not wait to try my Italian dinner. My wife said no problem. Tony make her Italian food. I was not prepared to do this on such a short notice. Certain Italain foods require at least and hour or longer of simmering so all the flavors marry up together. Has anyone of you fellows had this type of experience? Is this a culture clash or what. I too am a planner,i do everything by a plan,even though often the plan backfires or has to be modified,but,my wife is a "go with the flow"type person,and she will and does change her mind quite often.I think its a Chinese thing.maybe thats what keeps them looking young,they don't worry about the little crap,they take life as it comes. Jimi Link to comment
Kim-saru Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Not alone on this one. I plan ahead and sometimes months ahead. She'll call me about an hour before she gets off work and tells me that she will be online late to chat 'cuz she's going into town with a friend, or she will visit her aunt. Everything is on the fly. Link to comment
Urkidding Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 I guess that's why opposites attract! http://i28.tinypic.com/2zoyiiv.jpg Link to comment
Kim-saru Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 Okay, talk about change of plans. She just told me today that she quit her job and will take a week break before looking for a new one. Then to top that off she wants to move to a smaller place to help save money (BTW, she's not very good at that). What to do, what to do. Is this unstable or just a plain case of "I don't know what I want out of life"? Link to comment
Guest Pommey Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 get used to it remember its ok for her plans to change daily. Your plan is as important as Dons cats unless it fits somewhere in her long range ever flexible plan. Remember who runs the show. Link to comment
warpedbored Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 I doubt it has as much to do with cultural differences as it does with gender. Girls wil be girls. Link to comment
sweattrl1 Posted May 3, 2009 Report Share Posted May 3, 2009 my wife is a God sent , she have gitten me orginzed, and she really know how to run a tight ship,i guess tha comes from her management jobs she had in china, any way she saves me a lot of money ,and her way work, mine don't Link to comment
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