david_dawei Posted November 20, 2005 Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 (edited) The premise of this post is to explore if we really understand and know our chinese SO's culture and heritage as much as we should... --- It is once said that when Kung-Sun Lung was passing the frontier, the frontier guard said: "Horses are not allowed to pass". Hung-Sun Lung replied: "My horse is white, and a white horse is not a horse". And so saying, he passed with his horse. --- I recently asked a chinese lady member of CFL (Vette), well articulate in english language, to state her "top 10" for an american man to understand about their chinese lady... here is a wonderful list produced immediately upon asking: 1. her personalities2. her thoughts3. her family4. her education5. her friends6. the city where she lives7. if she's adapt to change8. is she's a quick learner9. can she well manage pressure and challenge10. is she willing to compromise --- As for the topic title... I told my wife tonight about the items to be posted on this thread and then stated the herein quote ("A white horse is not a horse"). She jumped up and exclaimed, "this is very famous" and jumped about me. I think that you can choose: Either work on this list or work on understanding the enigmatic quotes of ancient chinese philosophy. They both will most likely lead you to a path travelled by your SO... Edited November 23, 2005 by DavidZixuan (see edit history) Link to comment
frank1538 Posted November 20, 2005 Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 The premise of this post is to explore if we really understand and know our chinese SO's culture and heritage as much as we should...170169[/snapback]To me the short answer is no, but that won't stop me from continuing to learn and to better understand. Link to comment
tonado Posted November 20, 2005 Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 (edited) The premise of this post is to explore if we really understand and know our chinese SO's culture and heritage as much as we should...170169[/snapback]To me the short answer is no, but that won't stop me from continuing to learn and to better understand.170242[/snapback]It is impossible to learn the SO's culture because it is constantly changing. You think you got it right and then she does a 180 degrees. Sometimes it is not culture but her beliefs. Edited November 20, 2005 by ttlee_99 (see edit history) Link to comment
david_dawei Posted November 20, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 I don't quite agree with the idea that it's impossible to learn our SOs culture... which I think contributed towards who she is, why she thinks and believes in certain issues the way she does. We talked a little about this issue today.. since she knew nothing about american culture and didn't even know english when we first meet... Yet, she adapts more easily than I would of imagined. She said that when we first meet in china, she could see that I was a person who adapted quickly to the environment... She said that if I was to go over to china and insist on eating hamburgers or different food all the time, then it would of ended without a word. Today, I asked her what would happen if she did not like the US? She replied, "I followed you here... if it doesn't work out, I always believed you would follow me as well"... --- So, I wonder if all that we are asking of our SOs is the same that we would be willing to do for them as well ? Also, who gets more frustrated between the two, and what is the source of that? Is it simply not knowing them, being inflexible on one side, or what? Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted November 20, 2005 Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 I don't quite agree with the idea that it's impossible to learn our SOs culture... which I think contributed towards who she is, why she thinks and believes in certain issues the way she does. We talked a little about this issue today.. since she knew nothing about american culture and didn't even know english when we first meet... Yet, she adapts more easily than I would of imagined. She said that when we first meet in china, she could see that I was a person who adapted quickly to the environment... She said that if I was to go over to china and insist on eating hamburgers or different food all the time, then it would of ended without a word. Today, I asked her what would happen if she did not like the US? She replied, "I followed you here... if it doesn't work out, I always believed you would follow me as well"... --- So, I wonder if all that we are asking of our SOs is the same that we would be willing to do for them as well ? Also, who gets more frustrated between the two, and what is the source of that? Is it simply not knowing them, being inflexible on one side, or what?170317[/snapback]I'm willing to learn, It's my willingness to learn asian art that got us together and she knows I'm willing to move to her, Because of my classes and my mother she knows we need to stay in the states for a while once my duties are done here we will move to asia where ever my degree will give me a good job, be it viet nam or china Robert Link to comment
se_lang Posted November 20, 2005 Report Share Posted November 20, 2005 "A horse is a horse of course unless of course the horse is Mr Ed" Was Mr Ed a white horse? Link to comment
MoonCarolCafe Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 here is a wonderful list produced immediately upon asking: 1. her personalities2. her thoughts3. her family4. her education5. her friends6. the city where she lives7. if she's adapt to change8. is she's a quick learner9. can she well manage pressure and challenge10. is she willing to compromiseThat list applies to women (and men) from Texas, France, and Brazil too. Link to comment
goneflying2000 Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 THATS A HORSE OF A DIFFERENT COLOR Link to comment
warpedbored Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 Last I looked a white horse was still a horse but then I didn't look him in mouth either. Link to comment
Trigg Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 here is a wonderful list produced immediately upon asking: 1. her personalities2. her thoughts3. her family4. her education5. her friends6. the city where she lives7. if she's adapt to change8. is she's a quick learner9. can she well manage pressure and challenge10. is she willing to compromiseThat list applies to women (and men) from Texas, France, and Brazil too.170937[/snapback]Personalities??? Isn't that plural??? Is my wife suffering form MPD???? No wonder she is so hard to win an arguement with---I'm outnumbered!!!! Link to comment
david_dawei Posted November 23, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 Last I looked a white horse was still a horse but then I didn't look him in mouth either.170997[/snapback]Yes.. and there is a bit of a silly discourse written on the topic from ancient times, although consistent with the prevailing philosophy of the time... The premise is that white denotes color and horse denotes shape/form... Link to comment
Yuanyang Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 Right. Sounds like the ancient Chinese philosophers were the predecessors to American Lawyers. PS It's still a damn horse! Link to comment
tywy_99 Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 The premise of this post is to explore if we really understand and know our chinese SO's culture and heritage as much as we should... --- It is once said that when Kung-Sun Lung was passing the frontier, the frontier guard said: "Horses are not allowed to pass". Hung-Sun Lung replied: "My horse is white, and a white horse is not a horse". And so saying, he passed with his horse. --- I recently asked a chinese lady member of CFL (Vette), well articulate in english language, to state her "top 10" for an american man to understand about their chinese lady... here is a wonderful list produced immediately upon asking: 1. her personalities2. her thoughts3. her family4. her education5. her friends6. the city where she lives7. if she's adapt to change8. is she's a quick learner9. can she well manage pressure and challenge10. is she willing to compromise --- As for the topic title... I told my wife tonight about the items to be posted on this thread and then stated the herein quote ("A white horse is not a horse"). She jumped up and exclaimed, "this is very famous" and jumped about me. I think that you can choose: Either work on this list or work on understanding the enigmatic quotes of ancient chinese philosophy. They both will most likely lead you to a path travelled by your SO...170169[/snapback]Pretty cool post David. I've been thinking about it since you posted it the other day, especially the part about the the white horse. Link to comment
david_dawei Posted November 23, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 I went back to my original post and gave credit to Vette for the list.. the spoken author... B) I think Vettes list is very insightful... Frankly, I see that my wife possess the last four extremely well.. and continues to validate to me that she is the real reason the relationship is going well... despite all my faults... Link to comment
Joanne Posted April 12, 2007 Report Share Posted April 12, 2007 Frankly, I see that my wife possess the last four extremely well.. and continues to validate to me that she is the real reason the relationship is going well... despite all my faults... And she is optimistic, upbeat. Link to comment
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